The Drugs Don't Work

This morning when I woke at noon,

I combed my hair with a table spoon,

Put on my poncho in a rush

And cleaned my teeth with the lavvy brush.

Cornflakes and jam, with eggs on top,

And a pint of gravy with fizzy pop,

Then on the bus to meet Bruce Lee,

For my daily fix of LSD.

By Jonathan Dickie