Elfin Safety

Christmas comes but once a year,
Baubles, bubbly and festive cheer,
Turkey, trimmings, red tableware,
Presents prepped with love and care.

But the workers are slacking, taking time off,
Some are on strike, holding placards aloft,
Back to your stations! New toys to be fashioned,
The elves are unhappy, enthusiasm rationed.

Lead in the paint, sharp edges and more,
Elf and Safety infringements galore,
A severe lack of pride from indolent midgets,
Leaves poisoned wee weans, minus some digits.

Here come the polis, trading standards in tow,
Santa's in bother, vicariously liable you know,
The lazy elves snigger as Santa gets jailed,
Click on to Amazon, get your weans' pressies mailed.

A Festive Poem
By Jonathan Dickie